AIDS Is Healthy

From the  AIDS Is Healthy  desk:

Grab a partner
Spin 'em round
Don't stop 'till they hit the ground

Smack their face
Show some sass
Grab a knife and stab their ass

Ass ass ass
Ass ass ass
Ass ass ass
Ass

Ass Stabbings
I'll Get You Next Time

From the  I'll Get You Next Time  desk:

I am Mr David McClean. I have a secure and confidential business proposal for you. I will give you more details as regards this transaction as soon as you notify me of your interest. Awaiting your urgent reply via my personal email address

Secure and Confidential
Cheeburger Cheeburger Cheeburger

From the  Cheeburger Cheeburger Cheeburger  desk:

jn7uh-[;l6m65,5; yh4utr'mjuhn ybgrp5j55j' 5[ hymjuvtr']5 45t5thj4hj4hjjjj jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj4h jvrfhmmj77jjyyyj ju7yjj u7mj7t4rf nb ;l,k0 d'6j\km6hn jjnn11+,

From My Cat's Asshole
Happiness is Corn

From the  Happiness Is Corn  desk:

Tebowmania has resulted in far too much negative backlash from naysayers and non-believers. What I find so hilarious is the very people who go out of their way to proclaim their rights to believe as they choose, are the very same people climbing atop Tim Tebow's head and shitting all over the guy because he's outwardly Christian. Why not just have a Coke and a smile and shut the fuck up?

I Love Tim Tebow Because So Many Others Despise Him
Fuck You Hitler

From the  Fuck You Hitler  desk:

Dear sir,

My name is Mohamed Alshaikh Bahrainian Citizen based in Libya as business associate and personal Assistant to Mr. Saif Al-Islam who was arrested 20th November 2011 with two of his Aids while trying to flee to Niger Republic by the National Transaition Government who over throw the late Colonel Gadaffi Government after the 9 months war.

Before his arrest, we have been able to move the sum of euros40Million and the sum of $240Million through Niger Republic to Nabouring country Benin Republic where it was lodged in Escrew account along 230Kilos of Gold, Can we work together over this project?

Your Deal Is Confidential
Change Was Enough

From the  Change Was Enough  desk:

Attention Sir/Madam,

My name is Mr.Wong Hoong.I am a financial consultant based in Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia.I deal with both Local and International financial affairs for the Government,private and public personnel concerning unclaimed fund,assets, stocks, bonds, dormant savings account, security deposits, inheritance and Investment analysis.I also work for the world,united nations and the International Monetary Fund(IMF) regarding unclaimed fund here in Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia.

You Can't Go Wrong With Wong
Happiness is Corn

From the  Happiness Is Corn  desk:

1) To completely demolish someone someone as graphically as a giraffe abortion

I hope the Brazilian Soccer Team gives them a nice giraffe abortion in the Confederation Semi-Finals

2) To suck at something so horribly, its as if you're sucking an unborn giraffe fetus out of its mother's womb

DUDE! I suck giraffe abortions at this math thing yo.

Giraffe Abortion
Country Boys Can Survive

From the  Country Boys Can Survive  desk:

I am currently trying to decide between Yankee Candle Company and an abortion clinic as a potential future place of employment. Both are walking distance from my current living situation, meaning I could get some nice exercise going to and from work each day. With one gig, I'd be forced to deal with the almost unbearable stench of cinnamon all day long. With the other, I'd be juggling urine samples and slinging around boxes of condoms. As you can see, both sound amazing. Decisions, decisions.

Money For Nothing And Chicks For Free
Plug The Hole

From the  Plug The Hole  desk:

There are far too many college bowl games. Currently watching the New Era Pinstripe Bowl from Yankee Stadium and the place is maybe half full. MAYBE. When you're pitting Iowa St (6-6) vs. Rutgers (8-4), what in hell do you expect? Six loses gets you to a friggin' bowl game? What a prank. No wonder most of these games don't even sniff a sellout. Who wants to drop $60 (for the worst seat in the house) to see 4 quarters of mediocrity? $60 buys you 2 whores in the Third World. I mean, if you're gonna fuck off some money, FUCK OFF SOME MONEY.

Monster Chicken Bowl Game
Time Anus

From the  Time Anus  desk:

A couple married 25 yrs celebrate by staying at the same hotel as they did on their Honeymoon. As she undresses she asks her hubby, "What did you think the first time you saw me naked?"

He says, "I wanted to fuck your brains out & suck your tits dry.”

Then as she removes her clothes she asks, "And what are you thinking now?"

He replies, “I’m thinking how it looks like I did a pretty good job."

Love and Marriage

Pages

All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental, especially those stunningly apparent to them and anyone who knows them.

Doc Brown's Toilet is here to provide the Internet's finest sporadically updated humor from the dark recesses of life and the mind. The Doctor has ordered you to increase your daily intake of fun by a minimum of 30%. Failure to do so will result in six cats, biscuit poisoning, and an addiction to mindless online games. Don't be that person.

Here they come to snuff the rooster.

Subscribe to Doc Brown's Toilet RSS

© 2011-2012 DocBrownsToilet.com | Design by TwoReverends

Powered by Drupal